Those monkeys? Nothing to do with me!

LWeekend catch up this morning!

Saturday was a fun day with a trip down to Airbourne. Lots of watching the Red Arrows, eating a yummy lunch and chilling out back here at home.

No smoothie as we had a cheeky cooked breakfast, and no dinner as we had the left overs from Friday's takeaway!

Sunday had a bit more creativity. 

Back on the breakfast smoothies again...and as this happens every morning and is basically the same recipe every morning - 2 bananas, couple of handfuls of kale or spinach, almond milk and some other fruit - I have decided not to bore you with it unless I try something different. I kind of feel that although I am making something, it is not really challenging my creativity, and is probably not an area where I want to put lots of creative time and thought.

I made vegetable chow mein for dinner. No photos as I forgot to take them! Easy recipe which I usually use for chicken or prawns but as we were having spare ribs I just made it with veggies. 

You marinate veggies, or chicken, or prawns or Quorn in dark soy sauce, sesame oil, cornflour and Chinese 5 spice. You cook the noodles, then stir fry the marinating mix (if you are doing chicken or prawn, I add spring onions, red pepper and bean sprouts at this point) Add the cooked noodles to the stir fry mix and there you go! Yummy! 

Not my recipe, I got it from this book which you can get on Amazon. Nice easy recipes, and usually not a huge list of crazy ingredients!

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Chinese-Food-Made-Ching-He-Huang/dp/0007264984/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1471243361&sr=8-1&keywords=chinese+food+made+easy

I also did some drawing.

This is how I want to be...lighter, freer, more random, more scattered. Not everyone's choice, I know! Most people want to be more organised, not more random, but in order to feel lighter and freer, I need space to be random and scattered. Routine helps a bit, but restraint does not. I kick against it, I feel anxious and suffocated, and a tiny bit rebellious! 

I also did some thinking about being judgmental. I realised I need to be less in everyone else's business, as well as being kinder to myself. (Awful to think that whatever I am judging myself so harshly for, e.g Simon's grubby face means I am not a caring mother, I probably apply to others...who wants to be that person? Not me, no sirree!) 

In the spirit of this, I printed out this colouring page.

This is a Polish saying which means, not my problem. I need to remind myself when I start getting all Judgy McJudgeface with other people that it's not my circus, those aren't my monkeys! In other words, butt out! 

Now that all got a bit heavy, so just to end on a lighter note, here is my favourite monkey in my circus!

Paint...everywhere!

Yesterday's creativity was mostly aimed at helping Simon be creative.

I made a breakfast smoothie...back to khaki I'm afraid, as it had strawberries in it!

Simon and I then did some painting. We went into the garden and I put down a plastic cloth and a big piece of paper and put some paint in a dish. I stripped Simon down to his nappy and let him get stuck in!

We had a great time! Simon preferred to paint his body rather than the paper, and he liked the paint being squirted directly on to the paper rather than in the dish. He found it easier to move around like that, and kept asking for 'bore' which means 'more!'

This was the final masterpiece, and he was so pleased with it! 

After our last go at paining like this (see my post 'plagiarism and getting messy' http://joscreativeblog.blogspot.co.uk/2016/08/plagiarism-and-getting-messy.html) I tried really hard to just relax and go with the flow, and I think I did well, as Simon was basically a multicoloured baby, and I had a fair bit of paint on me too. I'm glad we were outdoors though, as when it came time to wash off the paint I discovered it stained - Simon now has a tide line of brown round his tummy where his nappy was, and I have stained trousers! Thank goodness it was a hot day, the paddling pool was out and Simon quite likes being squirted with the sprinkler on the hose! Once the worst was off I cuddled him up in a towel and up into the shower to warm up!

As the saying goes 'you can't make an omelette without breaking eggs' and if you are going to be creative you have to be able to cope with mistakes, stains, disappointments, disasters, successes and going with the flow.

When I was doing my final piece for my Foundation diploma, I so didn't want to do an installation...it was just too art studenty. And what did I do? Take a look here http://joscreativeblog.blogspot.co.uk/search/label/Foundation and at other June 2012 posts. I remember a sense of inevitability that it HAD to be an installation, as in the piece wanted it. It wasn't my choice, other than I went with it, but it was the way the art work needed to go. I hadn't really experienced that before, but it is exactly what happened. 

Smoothie...and it isn't khaki!

Here is yesterday's creativity!

It's a mango, banana, almond milk and kale smoothie...and it's a beautiful shade of green...and it's not khaki! It was also delicious!

That was all yesterday. No baking, no drawing, no colouring and a dinner of ready made pies, oven chips and baked beans. And I had a great day!

Noticing my creativity is not another stick to beat myself with, it is just noticing; no judgement, no guilt, just awareness. Good lesson learnt! 

Baking

Today I made apple, pear and blueberry muffins, in two sizes! Simon loved the little ones! Weightwatchers recipe so made with fruit not added sugar and with low fat spread. Yum! (Just as a side note, I made the easiest dinner ever because I used up my cooking energy making these...pasta with fried ham and mushrooms, covered in grated cheese)

I also made a khaki smoothie - blueberry, banana and baby kale.

I also went all arty and took some photos around the house.

I like this because the cushion was made from a t shirt I wore when I was pregnant which said 'dream big'...Just reminded me to think about what my dreams are. A bedroom without piles of clothes? Time and space to make stuff? Mmm, needs more thought!

My creative corner of the spare room...plus two cupboards full of fabric, art materials, puppets etc

Now some arty bathroom shots!

And a random brick left as a trip hazard by Simon!

Budding African violet...I think the window sill is too sunny for it!

Leftovers from the muffins!

I'd forgotten how much taking photos makes you look. My phone is full of Simon snaps, although even with him I try and get the interesting shot of him covered in dinner, or looking cute when asleep! We are so spoilt with digital cameras and cameras in our phones now. You can snap away, experiment and try things without worrying about the cost of the film. And you can delete or keep as you wish!

Classic movie quote!

"Jules, y'know, honey... this isn't real. You know what it is? It's St. Elmo's Fire. Electric flashes of light that appear in dark skies out of nowhere. Sailors would guide entire journeys by it, but the joke was on them... there was no fire. There wasn't even a St. Elmo. They made it up. They made it up because they thought they needed it to keep them going when times got tough, just like you're making up all of this. We're all going through this. It's our time at the edge."

This quote is from a film which was a big part of my teenage years. If you don't recognise it, I will tell you at the end of this post! 

Why am I quoting it? Because I feel like some of the angst of the past few weeks has been St Elmo's Fire. The stress levels are falling now the house is all finished and in order to keep the adrenaline levels up I whipped up a storm about nothing. But the stupid thing is, I don't want to live on my nerves. I want to be fun, lighthearted, relaxed. 

The main thing I've felt that God has been saying to me recently is 'Stop digging!' Stop looking for problems, stop poking beehives with sticks, stop looking for problems when there aren't any. Instead, lift up your head, look around, rest your dirty and battered hands in your lap and just notice where you are and how great it is.

I did some drawing in my journalling Bible about this. The story is in Matthew chapter 8, and describes Jesus and the disciples, some of whom were very experienced fishermen, in a boat in a life threatening storm. Jesus is asleep and the disciples are going crazy with panic, thinking they are all about to die. They wake Jesus up, and he is a bit surprised, asking why they are in such a panic. He then commands the wind and waves to stop...AND THEY DO!!!

Here's my picture for these verses.

I illustrated these verses because Jesus is in my self created storm. He has the power to tell it to stop, to be still. The blustering lies and thoughts, the thundering emotions are stilled because Jesus is more powerful than they are.

I'm watching the storm calm already. The air feels fresher, I feel invigorated now the danger is past, and as if I have been bought somewhere new by the storm; not shipwrecked, but to a new quay, a new fishing ground, a new beach to land on. Exciting, huh?

In the midst of this storm of my own creating, has there been some other creating going on?

Yes!

Another khaki smoothie - strawberry, banana and baby kale with almond milk

I put down some weed proof membrane for a fruit and veg container garden. Simon helped by putting little bits of soil in flowerpots and by dabbling his hands in the cold paddling pool water and the muddy soil,where I watered the plants.

I made a pork casserole type thing using the leftovers from Sunday. I added chick peas, onion, red pepper and chopped tomatoes, chucked the lot in the slow cooker (I have an instant pot which is one of the best kitchen gadgets ever, as in ever!) and 3 hours later we had pork casserole!

Oh, I nearly forgot...

The quote is from the classic 80s Brat Pack movie St Elmo's Fire! If you guessed correctly have some Brownie points...or a chocolate brownie...or a glass of wine. If you didn't guess correctly, or have no idea what I'm talking about, then have a chocolate brownie or glass of wine anyway, and go and watch the film! 

Finding affirmation

Oh my goodness, what a day Monday turned out to be! I had my second puncture in a week and had to be 'recovered' with the little guy, by a big lorry! Simon got to ride in his car seat up front and enjoyed it, making 'brmmm, brmmm' noises as we went. 

We also had swimming lessons and a picnic with an old friend. Chatting with her helped banish some more crappy mummy myths, as did a lovely email from my daughter in law. The tribe of mummy and the tribe of artist are filled with self doubters, and we need to be kind, extend a hand, share an encouragement and help each other.

And what about creativity?

Well, I did do four more lines of quilting while Simon had a pre-swimming nap, and I made barbecue sauce for the left over pulled pork. I used ketchup, American mustard, brown sugar, lemon juice and Worcestershire sauce. I mixed in the pork and microwaved it. Yummy!

Now, I still have some creativity left over from the weekend to tell you about. I've been reading a book called Messy Canvas by Mandy Steward. You can find her website here http://www.mandysteward.com/ 

Her book 'Thrashing around with God' has sparked some thought and conversations over the past few weeks in our house, and actually led to me looking for the creativity in my own life. She was told, as a young mum of four, that art would have to take a back burner for a season. And she wasn't willing to accept that!

Anyway, after reading 'Thrashing about with God',  I read Messy Canvas and a couple of quotes really struck me as they are EXACTLY what I've been thinking. So I copied them into a notebook. (I was going to say my notebook, but I always have several notebooks which I am writing stuff in or drawing in)

Here's the first...about artists.

And here's the other one, which is about claiming the title of artist.

It's harder to read so here's what it says.

'They'll be expecting me to draw or paint or take pictures of their family and possibly dance...they won't understand it's my very life. My tools are all around me. Sometimes I paint with food. Sometimes I make music with laughter. Sometimes I write with hugs and touches and trips into nature. Sometimes I dance with sunsets and fireflies, sipping a glass of wine with the husband of my youth. My art is my life and I am always creating it.'

That's it! That is jolly well it! What I am trying to do and be and feel! I am an artist here and now, with what I have and what I can do, with my levels of time, energy, skill, finances and imagination. Would I like to be like Tracey Emin and have a studio and just do artist stuff all the time? Maybe, but there's already one of her and the world also needs one of me, with my creativity, influenced by my life, my faith, my circumstances, my experiences, my emotions. 

If you want to read Messy Canvas for yourself it's available for free in Mandy's shop here http://www.mandysteward.com/shop/?category=eBooks

Whatever you are doing today, enjoy it and revel in your creativity!

Weekend

Weekends...those days I used to get off from work, but now, being a parent...well, it's not exactly the same!

But I try not to do housework on the weekend...unless it's an emergency...like an exploded nappy, or exploded blender, or actually anything that explodes really.

I do cook though, and this Sunday I made pulled pork. Here it is before it's been pulled. It was very easy. Put it in a pot with a lid, with 500ml water and cook at 160 for 4 hours. Then pull apart with forks.

I added celery and leek to the water, plus thyme and rosemary and garlic, and I rubbed on brown sugar, cumin and pimento.

It was soft and delicious but needs a sauce...a nice rich barbecue type sauce...

I had a bit of a blah week last week, culminating in me writing down some crappy (excuse the language) mummy myths which needed busting. For example, in my head last week feeding Simon baby food pouches meant I had failed and was the equivalent of giving him turkey twizzlers and putting cola in his sippy cup. 

Yup, my head was FULL of that sort of rubbish, so I wrote a list of crappy mummy myths, wrote refuting arguments and crushed 'em!

Then I drew this...

I'm going to colour it in...maybe...or maybe it served its purpose and now I can move on and leave the crappy mummy myths behind. (Did you know that even if you have managed to avoid juice and chocolate but have caved on biscuits and crisps, even the baby ones, then Jamie Oliver and Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall are already on their way to picket your house, publicly berate you and lead you through town wearing a placard saying 'bad mummy'? Apparently, it's true!) 

I did do some more creativity related stuff, but I will save that for tomorrow! 

And to the friend who posted on Facebook her beautiful colouring...most definitely creative!

More thoughts on that tomorrow...